Yummy Mummy

A healthy appetite for all things sexy during pregnancy IS NORMAL...
Having sex is often an important part of your relationship - it helps you to be intimate and forge a strong bond with your partner. Although a healthy appetite for all things sexy is a normal consequence of being pregnant, you may find at certain times that your ever-growing bump, tiredness and worries about safety can leave you reaching for a good book instead of your partner! The truth is, sex in a normal low-risk pregnancy is completely safe as long as you and your partner are happy with what you do.

Communication is the Key…
When you go out for a pizza, you tell the waiter exactly how you want it cooked, whether you want a thin or deep base, and would add all your favourite toppings, because that ’ s what you want and how you like it. It ’ s the same with sex - although we wouldn ’ t recommend topping yourself with melted cheese and pepperoni - your partner would definitely think that pregnancy had gone to your brain! Joking aside, you really need to talk to your partner about what feels good, and what is not so good. Now we ’ re not talking discussions around the breakfast table, and if you feel a bit embarrassed about actually saying what is nice, try being a bit more vocal when your partner does something that feels good for you. Mutual trust and understanding is the basis for all strong relationships, but this can only be achieved if you are completely honest with each other.

Is it really safe?
Your baby is protected against harm in your womb by the bag of waters surrounding it, as this acts as a cushion against normal movement and slight pressure. There is also a thick mucous plug covering the neck of the womb (cervix) that is formed in the early stages of pregnancy, that protects your baby against infection. Unless you have a medical condition such as placenta praevia (where the placenta covers the opening of the womb) or if you have a history of miscarriages or premature labour, sex is completely safe for you. The best person to ask is your regular midwife, who will be able to advise you about whether sex is or is not recommended - do not be embarrassed to ask for advice, as she is there to help you. Keep in mind that your baby will be totally unaware of what is happening, although they may move more after you have had sex and this is just a normal response to your own movements.

Enjoy yourself…Protect yourself
You are still at risk of sexually transmitted disease (STD) during pregnancy - an STD could be potentially harmful to you and your baby, and so are best avoided. Reduce the chances of problems by only sleeping with one partner who does not have any other sexual partners, and if in doubt always use a condom. If the person you are sleeping with really cares about you, they should not mind keeping you and your baby safe. Get knowledgeable about STD’s at:

www.playingsafely.co.uk

What is normal?

• After about sixteen weeks, your breasts prepare for breastfeeding and will start to produce colostrum - the creamy yellowish ‘ first ’ milk that is high immunity-boosting nutrients and calories. During and after orgasm, your breasts may leak this, yet it is nothing to worry about and actually shows that your body is well prepared for life with baby.

• Later on in pregnancy, you may find that orgasm stimulates your womb to have ‘ Braxton-Hicks ’ contractions, where your tummy will feel tight for a few moments. These are practice contractions that tone your womb muscles for labour, and the same hormones produced during an orgasm cause these to occur.

• Bleeding in pregnancy is never normal, and some women find that they are more prone to bleeding after sexual intercourse whilst they are pregnant. It is very important that you seek the advice of your local maternity unit if this should occur, so that they can reassure you about the well being of you and your baby.

What positions are safe?
The truth is, as long as you are comfortable, no position is ‘ safer ’ than the other if you have sex whilst you are pregnant. However, worrying about whether you will fall off the kitchen side may be a bit of a passion-killer, so make sure you are in a comfortable place!

• Try the spoons position - Lie on your side whilst your partner enters you from behind. This allows for shallow penetration, and will take all of your partner ’ s weight off your womb.

• Get on top - The woman on top position gives you complete control over the depth of penetration and rhythm, and there is no weight on your womb.

• You could also try sitting on your partner ’ s lap whilst they sit in a sturdy armchair - though remember to turn the football/rugby off the telly!

What if sex is off the menu?
For whatever reason, you may have been advised by your caregivers to steer clear of actual sexual intercourse during your pregnancy. However, although penetration may not be safe, it is possible to find other ways to be intimate. Kissing, cuddling, taking baths together holding hands and massage will help you remain close during this time. If the feeling takes you, a quick bum-pinch or a snog in the park will keep the cheeky fun in your relationship.

Remember, keep a sense of humour. Accept that pregnancy will create all sorts of embarrassing, yet mostly funny situations and your growing body will change the way you make love. Try not to take things too seriously, and keep laughing with each other at the silly things - Where there's a will there's a way... so to speak!